Monday, September 9, 2013

entering into a new season.

We're entering into a new season over here and my heart is torn up. We have a busy few months of travel looming and as we prepared this summer, Chris and I decided it would be best to start weaning Silas. The Influence conference is in three weeks and that will be the first time I leave him overnight. I get a little bit weepy every time I think about it, though I know it will be good for both of us. I haven't even put much effort into the weaning thing. As he's started walking all over the place and eating three (and a half) meals each day, nursing has fallen to the low end of Si's priority list. I'd say conquering the stairs, eating blueberries, and watching doggies are the top three for him right now. It's as if my baby turned into a toddler overnight and I'm all sorts of bewildered about it.





From the very beginning, Silas and I have been blessed with an incredibly smooth nursing relationship. He had a great latch and ate like a champ from his first day. We had some issues with reflux in the early days, but when he started Zantac at four months, that greatly improved. Not for one second do I take our experience for granted. Just like I was prepared for anything to happen during Si's birth, I was fully prepared to struggle with breast-feeding. And why we were blessed with smooth-sailing, I'll never know. 

So, I'm often overcome with thankfulness that I've had 13 months of nursing this little boy. Countless middle of the night feeding sessions. Many hours of nursing in public and praying I wouldn't flash passersby. 394 days of milk-drunk newborn smiles, mid-feed toe grabbing and eventually giggles that made my heart soar. Any day now we could have our last nursing session together, so with each one (we're down to about one time per day), I try to soak in the tiny moments. The sleepy stares, the hand-holding, and the rare moments when he falls asleep in my arms. He's growing into a real live toddler boy right before my eyes, but when he's in my arms, he's still my tiny baby.

So bring it on, saggy boobs. And thanks for working so hard for us this past year. 

18 comments:

  1. It will be easier than you think! The hard part is how your body adjusts--my kiddo adjusted super quickly.

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  2. this is so beautiful! I too was blessed with a nice nursing experience :)
    his is so cute!

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  3. Oh, I know exactly how you're feeling right now! Though we had a rough start with breastfeeding, it was so wonderful once we got past the tough stuff! My daughter just weaned herself at 16 months...really, just a week shy of being 17 months. I had weaned her down to nursing twice a day, and after that I left it up to her. I wasn't surprised when she started refusing, but it was still difficult to end those sweet nursing sessions! I definitely miss it, but she hasn't really been affected. She's too busy to care, for the most part, and I still get some hugs and cuddles from time to time. It changes your relationship a bit, but not as much as I thought it would. :)

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  4. Hehehe! Bring it on saggy boobs! That cracked me up, but so true :) My littlest will be 1 next month, and her interest in nursing is waning every day - I know weaning will happen in the next few months for us too.

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  5. awwww it will be easier than you think to wean, but it is a sad sad day!! good luck hun!

    xo,
    Sandy
    Sandy a la Mode

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  6. Gabe self weaned around 11 months, I had been giving him some formula (I was never a big producer), but it just kind of happened naturally and wasn't a big deal at all in the end. I didn't even realize that our last day was going to be our last day. I've got to say though, I was thrilled to be able to wear whatever I wanted again, without having to think about whether or not it was conducive to nursing. So bring on the dresses! :)

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    1. Haha, yes! Dresses and cute bras again! I have some things I've been saving for when we're done just because I know they might get stretched or ruined otherwise! So there is a bright side!

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  7. We've had a similarly smooth experience, and I don't know why, either, but I'm so grateful. I never expected to love it like I do, those sweet times with my girl. (I'm assuming) we've still got a few months ahead of us, but your post made me kind of weepy! I'm sure its hard, but it has to happen eventually ;) That's a sweet, sweet boy you've raised. Good job, Mama!

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    1. Thanks girl! So glad to hear you had a sweet experience too.

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  8. I am at a stage right now where I have to decide whether I want to wean my son or let it happen on its own. He is just about 17 months, but we have our second due in 5 weeks! While we were on vacation a couple weeks ago, I tried to get him down to one feed from two, and it worked while we were away, but he wanted to get back to routine once we were home.

    So the question for me is should I force it on him so I don't have to nurse two at a time, or should I let him do what he wants, and maybe when my colostrum comes in, he won't like it and naturally wean then. I am a little bit curious if nursing the second child won't be as painful if I am still nursing my son. I am not really all that emotionally attached to nursing, so letting him continue would be more of an experiment for me.

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    1. Wow, I can't imagine nursing two at the same time! Kudos to you, mama!

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  9. My daughter is 21 months and we're slowly working on weaning. I'm leaving overnight next month, so I guess it better be done by then!

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  10. dude. I feel like I've been trying to wean Lucy for two months now but the girl.won't.quit. I never expected to be nursing a baby past 1. I just didn't think I would and Em quit at 11 mos. But, we're here. And, well, who knows when she'll stop. And also, my boobs are saggy NOW and I'm surprised they still make milk sometimes. They're pathetic. It always makes my heart nerdy and happy when a first time mom has a great nursing experience. So glad you did ;)

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    1. Haha, I'm totally with you on the state of the bewbs. I'm amazed that they still make enough to interest him. Our bodies are so weird and fascinating.

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  11. this post made me teary! my baby is nearly one and he still loves nursing. i wish i could be done but at the same time i dont want to stop! ahh. its a constant struggle.

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  12. This is so precious! What a beautiful way to look at things!

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  13. You did amazing mama!!! Welcome to the saggy boobs club!!! ;)

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  14. how wise of you to enjoy every moment and embrace the next season - it's a good outlook on life :) all the best in this transition - you're doing a wonderful job :)

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